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| houseofbeck.com |
Although this is intended for employees, these communication tidbits really show who we are and who we can become in the larger world. We have probably used or heard some of these without even considering what they really suggest to others. 'Good to learn these lessons early in life!
The list precedes the first part of the article.
28 Things You Should Never Say To Your Boss
Business Insider
jsmith@businessinsider.com
by Jacquelyn Smith
Aside from the obvious — like
profanity and insults — here are 28 phrases you should avoid:
"I can't."
A "can-do" attitude is
always a valued trait. "I can't" shows both a lack of confidence and
unwillingness to take chances — neither of which will endear you to management,
says Taylor.
"That's not my area." Or,
"That's not part of my job."
No job description is ever set in
stone. "As cross-functional teams remain the order of the day, you're
expected to be flexible and make your boss' life easier," Taylor explains.
"As a side note, the more skillsets you accumulate, the more indispensable
you are."
Saying that you're not willing to go
beyond your role shows that you are also not willing to pitch in for the
success of the company, Kahn adds.
"I don't know."
You may not have the answers to
every question, but your best guess and a promise to find out is much better
than a shrug of the shoulders, she says. "Anytime your boss would need to
do the work for you, assume that's not a path you should take."
"No."
Your cooperation is expected, and so
is a polite tone. "Telling your boss 'no' is
a challenge, and is sometimes necessary — but
it can be inappropriate if you don't phrase it well with an explanation,"
Taylor says. "For example, if your boss says, 'Do you have time to work on
the Smith project today?' you shouldn't just say, 'No.' Instead try something
like, 'Today will be a challenge if you still want me to focus on that company
presentation. Would you prefer I work on this today instead?'"
"I'll try."
Some people think that this is an
acceptable response, as we all "try" to get things done to our best
ability. But it leaves a manager feeling unsure, and when assignments are
given, your boss is counting on you, usually with specific deadlines, says
Taylor. "Imagine yourself asking, 'Will you be signing off on my paycheck
on the 15th?' and your boss responding, 'I will try.'"
"That's not what I heard."
Avoiding gossip and conjecture is a
good idea, as it can backfire. If you're not sure about something, wait, or you
risk appearing unprofessional.
"How do I benefit from
this?"
Sometimes your work involves helping
others and other departments. Bosses have little tolerance for those who aren't
team players, Taylor says.
"I'm sorry, but…"
"The caveat essentially cancels
any genuine apologetic sentiment," Taylor says. "A straight, 'I'm
sorry…I'll be much more aware of this next time' is the expected response when
you mess up."
"Well, I did my best."
This is a cop-out. If you made a
mistake, and that was your best, that doesn't speak highly of your abilities.
The better response is that you'll get it right next time.
"I'll leave."
Don't threaten to leave the company,
says Kahn. It's unprofessional and they'll consider you a flight risk.
"I just assumed that…"
That phrase causes frustration for
many bosses, as they'd rather hear that you made an error in judgment and
learned from it, versus excuses. "To err is human, but to defer blame is a
career killer," Taylor says.
"I've tried that before."
Bosses have little tolerance for
laziness. "Examine whether you really gave the option a shot before you
shoot it down," she suggests. "Your boss may have something else in
mind." Alternatively, explain that you appreciate the suggestion, and
tried XYZ, with such and such a result — but would be glad to try something
more effective.
"At my last job we did it this
way."
No manager likes a know-it-all, so
you must tread lightly if you think you have a better way. "You're better
off phrasing sensitive or challenging responses by turning them into questions
versus being confrontational," Taylor says.
"It's really not my fault; it's
John's fault."
The blame game is a treacherous
path. If you're innocent, then explain why. Don't implicate others if you bear
the primary responsibility, Taylor says.
"Taking responsibility is
key," adds Kahn. "If your always seen as someone pointing the finger,
eventually your boss is going to question who is really to blame."
"[Your predecessor] did this
differently/better."
"Bosses usually feel that their
methods are preferred over their predecessors because they now hold the
position," Taylor explains. "Unless a method is clearly a mistake,
don't challenge your boss with the 'old ways of doing things' just because they
made things easier for you."
"I'm bored."
"You may have a weak moment and
share your boredom with the wrong person: your boss," says Taylor.
"You're being paid to be productive and remain enthusiastic; it's your
responsibility to find ways to make your job interesting."
"I can't work with
him/her."
"Not playing well with
others" isn't good in elementary school, nor is it in the workplace. It's
assumed that you are capable of getting beyond personality conflicts in the
interest of delivering excellent results.
"He's a jerk."
"The golden rule is something
your boss expects you to observe, and casting aspersions on others has no
redeeming value. It just reflects badly on you," she says.
"If I don't hear from you, I'll
just do X."
This has a threatening tone. Better
to wait than be admonished later.
"Why does Jane always…?"
Whining is annoying. "If you
have a gripe, better to ask how you can attain a certain privilege, and leave
others out of the discussion," she suggests.
"Can I/we speak with your boss
about this?" Or, "I want to speak with HR about this."
"Going over your boss' head
challenges authority — a usually no-win situation, unless you're about to quit
(or be terminated) and have no other recourse," says Taylor.
If you're going to HR, don't
threaten in advance, she adds. "And you should avoid it unless you've
exhausted all the options with your boss."
"I don't have a solution."
Don't tell the boss about problems
without presenting potential solutions, says Kahn. "Leaders talk about
solutions; followers talk about the problems."
"Why does John have X and I
don't?"
Focus on your own career, not
others' salary or promotions — unless you're witnessing blatant favoritism.
"If that's the case, you can opt for a more professional discussion once
you've collected your thoughts about the facts," Taylor says.
"I'm pretty busy. Can it
wait?"
It's your responsibility to ask your
boss if priorities have changed, as your objectives must stay aligned with your
manager's. "Priorities are rarely stagnant, so as in most cases, your
better option is to ask if you should reshuffle them," she recommends.
"Can I leave early today since
things are slow?"
It's fine if you have to leave
early. But don't say it's because "things are slow" or you have
"nothing to do." "There are always more projects in the
pipeline. Bosses want you to show initiative," she says.
"That's impossible."
Your manager doesn't want to hear
negativity or a lack of conviction. If you have concerns, state what they are,
and ask for input.
One of the best approaches in
deciding whether to share your thoughts with your boss or ask sensitive
questions is to put yourself in their shoes, Taylor suggests. "Do your
comments and questions reflect a positive, can-do, and confident demeanor? Remember
loose lips sink ships — so choose your words carefully when you feel
challenged at work if you want to thrive in your career."
The introduction of the article
Honesty is the best policy in the
workplace — with a few exceptions.
"It's important to be cautious
with what you say to your boss, as even the slightest slip up could make or
break your career," says Ryan Kahn, a career coach, founder of The Hired Group, and
author of "Hired! The Guide for the
Recent Grad." "There are the
obvious things to hold back from saying to your boss, but the key is to dissect
the little things in your interactions."
Lynn Taylor, a national workplace
expert and the author of " Tame Your Terrible Office
Tyrant: How to Manage Childish Boss Behavior and Thrive in Your Job," agrees. "There are certain comments and
questions based on negative perspectives that can set you back with your
boss," she says. "If they continue unabated, these phrases can
sabotage an otherwise great job."
A good practice is to first pause
before blurting out something you might regret and examine what you're trying
to achieve, and the likely reaction you'll get from your boss.
"If you think you may regret
it, you probably will," she says. "Better to err on the side of
waiting until you can crystallize your thoughts into a more palatable and
professional dialogue."
In honor of National Boss Day, which
is celebrated in the US on October 16 each year, we've compiled a list of the
words and phrases you should never say to your manager.
Ret. 10-16-14
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