Leedey's B.I.S.O.N. Mentor Appreciation Banquet, April 22, generated thought about the power of
anyone's influence.
The Art of Manliness blog happens to be the choice for this still popular, relevant 1905 essay.
Manvotional: The Power of Personal Influence
by Brett & Kate McKay on September
11, 2010
The Power
of Personal Influence
from
Self Control, Its Kingship and Majesty by William George
Jordan, 1905
The only responsibility that a man cannot evade in this life is the one he
thinks of least,—his personal influence. Man’s conscious influence, when he is
on dress-parade, when he is posing to impress those around him,—is woefully
small. But his unconscious influence, the silent, subtle radiation of his
personality, the effect of his words and acts, the trifles he never considers,
—is tremendous. Every moment of life he is changing to a degree the life of the
whole world. Every man has an atmosphere which is affecting every other. So
silent and unconsciously is this influence working, that man may forget that it
exists.
All
the forces of Nature,—heat, light, electricity and gravitation,—are silent and
invisible. We never
see them.; we only know that they exist by seeing
the effects they produce. In all Nature the wonders of the “seen ” are dwarfed
into insignificance when compared with the majesty and glory of the “unseen.”
Into the hands of every individual is given a marvellous power for good or
for evil,—the silent, unconscious, unseen influence of his life. This is simply
the constant radiation of what a man really
is, not what he pretends
to be. Every man, by his mere living, is radiating sympathy, or sorrow, or
morbidness, or cynicism, or happiness, or hope, or any of a hundred other
qualities. Life is a state of constant radiation and absorption; to exist is to
radiate; to exist is to be the recipient of radiations.
There are men and women whose presence seems to radiate sunshine, cheer and
optimism. You feel calmed and rested and restored in a moment to a new and
stronger faith in humanity. There are others who focus in an instant all your
latent distrust, morbidness and rebellion against life. Without knowing why,
you chafe and fret in their presence. You lose your bearings on life and its
problems. Your moral compass is disturbed and unsatisfactory. It is made untrue
in an instant, as the magnetic needle of a ship is deflected when it passes
near great mountains of iron ore.
There
are men who float down the stream of life like icebergs,—cold, reserved,
unapproachable and self-contained. In their presence you involuntarily draw
your wraps closer around you, as you wonder who left the door open. These
refrigerated human beings have a most depressing influence on all those who
fall under the spell of their radiated chilliness. But there are other natures,
warm, helpful, genial, who are like the Gulf Stream, following their own
course, flowing undaunted and undismayed in the ocean of colder waters. Their presence
brings warmth and life and the glow of sunshine, the joyous, stimulating breath
of spring.
There
are men who are like malarious swamps,—poisonous, depressing and weakening by
their very presence. They make heavy, oppressive and gloomy the atmosphere of
their own homes; the sound of the children’s play is stilled, the ripples of
laughter are frozen by their presence. They go through life as if each day were
a new big funeral, and they were always chief mourners. There are other men who
seem like the ocean; they are constantly bracing, stimulating, giving new
draughts of tonic life and strength by their very presence.
There
are men who are insincere in heart, and that insincerity is radiated by their
presence. They have a wondrous interest in your welfare,—when they need you.
They put on a “property” smile so suddenly, when it serves their purpose, that
it seems the smile must be connected with some electric button concealed in
their clothes. Their voice has a simulated cordiality that long training may have
made almost natural. But they never play their part absolutely true, the mask
will
slip down sometimes; their cleverness cannot teach their eyes the
look of sterling honesty; they may deceive some people, but they cannot deceive
all. There is a subtle power of revelation which makes us say: “Well, I cannot
explain how it is, but I know that man is not honest.”
Man
cannot escape for one moment from this radiation of his character, this
constantly weakening or strengthening of others. He cannot evade the responsibility
by saying it is an unconscious influence. He can
select the qualities
that he will permit to be radiated. He can cultivate sweetness, calmness,
trust, generosity, truth, justice, loyalty, nobility,—make them vitally active
in his character,—and by these qualities he will constantly affect the world…
Men
and women have duties to others,—and duties to themselves. In justice to
ourselves we should refuse to live in an atmosphere that keeps us from living
our best. If the fault be in us, we should master it. If it be the personal
influence of others that, like a noxious vapor, kills our best impulses, we
should remove from that influence, —if we can possibly
move without
forsaking duties. If it be wrong to move, then we should take strong doses of
moral quinine to counteract the malaria of influence. It is not what those
around us do
for us that counts,—it is what they
are to us.
We carry our houseplants from one window to another to give them the proper
heat, light, air and moisture. Should we not be at least as careful of
ourselves?
To
make our influence felt we must live our faith, we must practice what we
believe. A magnet does not attract iron, as iron. It must first convert the
iron into another magnet before it can attract it. It is useless for a parent
to try to teach gentleness to her children when she herself is cross and
irritable. The child who is told to be truthful and who hears a parent lie
cleverly to escape some little social unpleasantness is not going to cling very
zealously to truth. The parent’s words say “don’t lie,” the influence of the
parent’s life says “do lie.”
No man can ever isolate himself to evade this constant power of influence,
as no single corpuscle can rebel and escape from the general course of the
blood. No individual is so insignificant as to be without influence. The
changes in our varying moods are all recorded in the delicate barometers of the
lives of- others. We should ever let our influence filter through human love
and sympathy. We should not be merely an influence,—we should be an
inspiration. By our very presence we should be a tower of strength to the
hungering human souls around us.
Photo: easyvectors.com
Ret. 4-25-13
